When I tried to define what’s bad for me, I was pulled down into a bigger pit filled with lots of what’s bad for people, the world and the universe.
Finding peace, to me, has so much to do with settling on my own personal view on what’s bad?
Some try to tame everything with a bad side…It’s bad to say this, It’s bad to do that…even blogging, It’s becoming bad to say certain things…posting little, posting too much…having a zillion blogs!
Just like it’s a neglected fact that my personal opinion or taste about something doesn’t automatically make it a no no for everybody else.
Two days ago I argued a concept, that doing something bad according to a set up while having the most pure feelings towards an issue or someone doesn’t equal getting into something bad with no reason nor intention but clear sharp desire to commit a bad thing!
yet again, who can set a list of outargued bad?
Is it logic that stealing a million dollars from a pesion account is as bad as stealing a loaf of bread to feed poor hungry children??!
If silly weak poeple are going to set such a harsh verdict mainly on themselves then that would be the living proof of how unfair they are because allah would pardon the hungry family!!
such ignorance flashed in my eyes earlier when i was a little girl, Some even try to generalize a certain Bad on everyone even other species!
I’ll never forget a girl I once knew when i was about 10 hitting two cats mating on the sidewalk with a soda can…I was shocked…I didn’t understand why has she done that, she said: I saw elbawab throw a stone at two dogs doing the same…he said it’s akbar 7aram!
What is bad for humans isn’t bad for animals…do I even have to mention that?!! yet, It’s a forgotten fact…among people in our society refer to making love between spouses as: 2elet adab!!! Imagine a grown woman stating that last night she 2alet adabha with her husband…
That is bad??? or 2elet adab is bad?? or 2elet adab is not bad any more???
Sins are bad…Allah said so…common sense says so… to kill, to steal, to lie, betray…etc.
They all have one thing in common: hurting others!
Adultery may not have a third party involved who might get hurt…yet it’s a sin…and i can understand why…because letting this strong lust on the loose will mess the human race…no one will know who’s the son of whom…other thing, casual sex…frequently makes a person loose a very important special private part of his/ her soul.
I can understand the bad in sins…I can’t though understand the bad in:
Deciding to be too clear and speak my mind without fear. they tell me not to…they tell me to spare myself unnecessary meaningless wars and untrue judgments because people do put 2 and 2 together and form an idea that I’m totally 22!!!
Showing appreciation and kindness towards any minor or major gesture from others to me…they tell me to not show…play hard to please…they tell me i will be used…misunderstood as flirty or as faking it or as any sick meaning other than the true simple thingie…when i feel thankful i say thank you.
Giving without counting my fingers…they say I’ll be stolen…my things…my time and my soul.
Not fearing competition, giving space for creativity, forgiving whoever ever hurt me…finding an excuse for every weak soul only because i know the most strong personalities and spirits can loose it in a second and get bare and fragile as an autumn leaf…I KNOW IT!
Experiencing my free will to do WHATEVER I want as long as i don’t hurt others! whatever i want whenever i want it without having to explain myself at every corner…however how contradicting it could seem.
I know that my not so bad is exhausting to bear…exhausting to apply…but what if that’s me?
What if I don’t want to change my list into someone Else’s??
What if i wanna keep adding and deleting from it along my journey because i know i shall never stop learning??
What if i need to love love itself without having to love a specific man or a specific type of people or a specific type of music or a specific anything…why not love whatever holds beauty…why not give our taste some room to expand??
what if i know my needs and my fears and my hopes and dreams without having to hide them nor feel shy that i have them??
I don’t know about all what’s bad!!
and I don’t know about all what’s good!!
I know what’s easier.
I don’t know which is better.
I just know that i can change my list, when i see a reason to.