A typical Devil…

And We’ve been informed that devils get chained and locked away during Ramadan…

And we’ve been informed that when devils get questioned for smoothing the paths of sin for people and urging them to commit what is forbidden and wrong, they plea innocent…they accuse people of holding all that is nasty and evil in their hearts…they claim that they only help people do what they want to do…they claim that people are more sinners than they ever were…they say: people could deny there’s a god and could deny having to obey him, but we never did that…we only made mistakes.

We’ve been informed that devils are weak and can never have any power over humans unless humans let them ride their wagons and guide their ways.

Ironic that devils have the “baga7a” to call people names and accuse them…

calling people who are sometimes sinful, weak and foolish the worst sinners, worst than all the harms and evil devils inflect is typical…typical of devils!!

And taking devils as the excuse to sin and fault is typical…typical of man!!

So…Evil are the devils…and foolish are the people…

and i bet that whoever commits evil and foolishness in Ramadan is: a typical human without excuse!!

typical!!

حقوق…وواجب واحد

من حقى أن أكون مختلفة…لدرجة أن أكون أنا جداً

ومن حق الآخرين أن يكونوا مختلفين لدرجة ان يكونوا هم جداً

وليس من حق أحد أن يراجع للإضافة أو للإنقاص من أكون أو من يكون آخر

للناس رأى…أبعد ما يمكن أن يصل فيه صاحبه هو أن يطبقه على النفس

للناس أهواء…ولى هوى…أملكه أنا وحدى ويملكونه

لى مساحة وللناس مساحات…لا تتقاطع حدودى مع حدودهم أبداً ولا تتماس

من حقى أن أرفض وأن أقبل وأن أتعايش وأرى الشىء مبهج أو تعيس

حقى وحدى أن أتقزز من فعل وأنتهج آخر

حق الآخرين مثل حقى بلا تدافع ولا محاولات سيطرة أو إيحاء وتضليل

من الحقوق ما يكفل حياة كاملة وحرية ومسئولية

من حقى أن أدافع عن حقى…وحق غيرى غير المستطيع

حقى كل شىء إن كان واجبى يملأ حياتى

أما الواجب فواحد: الحلال

 

 

When perfection sings

This lady has one amazing voice, so powerful and soulful and vibrant.

She has the perfect combination of talent, looks and performance.

Perfect voice, perfect lyrics, perfect music and this is another great live performance.

Christina Aguilera – You lost me

I am done, smoking gun
We’ve lost it all, the love is gone
She has won, now it’s no fun
We’ve lost it all, the love is gone

And we had magic
And this is tragic
You couldn’t keep your hands to yourself

I feel like our world’s been infected
And somehow you left me neglected
We’ve found our lives been changed
Babe, you lost me

And we tried, oh how we cried
We lost ourselves, the love has died
And though we tried you can’t deny
We’re left as shells, we lost the fight

And we had magic
And this is tragic
You couldn’t keep your hands to yourself

I feel like our world’s been infected
And somehow you left me neglected
We’ve found our lives been changed
Babe, you lost me

Now I know you’re sorry and we were sweet
But you chose lust when you deceived me
And you’ll regret it, but it’s too late
How can I ever trust you again?

I feel like our world’s been infected
And somehow you left me neglected
We’ve found our lives been changed
Babe, you lost me

Impulsive!

I am.

I act…I never freeze…I don’t wait…I engage…I work…

Nothing easily scares me on the spot…I panic later…when I’m done…when I’m alone…when I’m crying.

Or i panic and worry before…while waiting…anticipating…expecting.

I act aggressively when attacked…I act contained and calm in hard times…

I act impulsively…I think and weigh things after i have acted…sometimes I blame myself for being impulsive and sometimes i praise myself for being strong or passionate and quick.

I act…I step up…I do…

But acting is draining…and i need some rest.

I’ve been needing some rest for quiet some time now.

I need a break…and i often think that maybe a break is not a good thing for me…or maybe breaks are not for people like me…and now, as exhausted as i am, i think that i can’t afford a break even if it’s a good thing.

so…impulsive i am…and i can’t change for the time being…I need to stay alert…focused…working on my life…and i need to stay active.

Maybe my renewed energy to act, fight or innovate…is an instinct developed by fear…and faith.

Yes, faith and fear combined.

One can’t exist without the other…I can’t exist without both…

can someone?!!

Articulate Self

I speak…I know how to speak…how to make myself clear…How to make my case…How to elaborate how i feel…I know how to speak.

Months ago I bragged my ability of speaking my mind regardless of ANY consequences…I always let out how i feel in accurate words…I bragged it and i practiced my rightful right to speak up and unfold my thoughts, information i have and how i feel about them.

Very recently i challenged myself to control my spoken emotions…to speak of an idea without its details and without its proof.

Why?

Because I’m being selfish…I gave myself the liberty to be selfish and exercise my Machiavellian aspect.

I choose to keep somethings quiet to preserve my nerves…to maintain stability although it maybe a fake one.

I choose to keep a routine and let life unfold leaves of wisdom farther from the narrow margin of wisdom i chose previously to live in…I choose to let time pass…fix…uncover…maybe heal.

I still speak…but in time of difficulty i learned to contain my urge to scream out the sharp words i need to say…I sit back and let the stream of other dangerous minds hover around me…defined as they truly are, without any interference from my side…let meanings live…lies occur…love grow and ties tighten or crawl away loose.

“Time needs time” a dear friend of mine used to tell me that, while laughing at how silly it sounds and how resentful i look…she just knew that my restless impatient  self  needs to be gracefully aware that time fixes sore/confusing situations.

I have let my words be my sword of revenge…as I’ve let them be silk sheets that wrap my loved ones.

Recently I’ve been practicing saying  less…well, sometimes.

My actions are a totally different story…another story.

Angry China plate

In an interview, I was asked about my downside…my faults…and i answered that i get angry…I can’t act cool when I’m boiling inside…

Actually i can’t act cool even if I’m just a bit angry.

As a matter of fact, I can’t look happy when I’m sad…can’t look satisfied when I’m not…can’t seem OK when something is on my mind.

My face is as clear as a flawless white china plate, where a point of the palest shade of color shows on it.

So…I heard a lot of complaints about this nature of mine.

Even as a child i used to be a pain because if something troubled me it would show even if we had guests or were throwing a party…If i didn’t like something my face yells it!

I never cried or nagged for something…but i was/am still very sensitive towards hurtful actions or words.

Maybe that’s why most of the time i mean what i say…I choose my language even with friends…I never get too comfy and use cruel language when addressing a friend…and when i fight i mean 90% of every word i speak…10% is often a mess if it’s a big fight to the extent of a “shut mind”.

As a grown up people who spent an average amount of time with me would recognize my upset face…I don’t frown…but my features look exactly as i feel.

At some point, and upon much nagging by many people, i considered trying to control my features…I gave it a very hard try and discovered that: i can master pretending to be sad or angry when I’m not really so…but i could never pretend being happy when I’m disgusted or hurt or provoked.

I can’t keep my cool…not for the sake of wit,winning a million or having a dream come true.

And i don’t consider keeping a poker face while angry or hurt to be a skill or a justified mean towards a a certain end. 

I realized that i would be doing good to the people provoking my disgusted/angry/sad face…I won’t be doing myself any good…actually suppressing feelings can give me a stroke.

and why would i give such relief to people who would betray my love…just to ease their minds and don’t force them to face the hurt they inflict?!!

And why would i live in denial and let the liar lie some more…the hurtful hurt some more…the ignorant damage some more…the deception goes on some more? so that people would keep on living as undercover mass destruction utilities?!!

Hell no!!

I always choose to face…confront…discuss…fight…cry…ache.

And I always choose to think thoroughly afterwards…decide for the best…give more chances…forgive or forget…hold on or move on.

I can’t change my features. but i can think repeatedly about my status, right after i have expressed myself.

Oh, all the above and i haven’t mentioned my disability to shut up when I’m feeling bad about something…but that’s a whole new post.