Cairo Winter

The burning sun cools a bit…the fuming dust rests a bit…night noise tones down a bit…

My skin likes smooth fabric covering it heavier bit by bit…hot drinks are favored a bit and ice melts goodbye…

Walks are longer and more frequent…outings are earlier…nights are lonelier…and mornings are louder and busier…

I meet my winter…for i have grasped my first breath in December and it was chilling cold i bet…

I meet my winter and i miss Cairo winter…when streets sparkle at night and its yellow lights bring me moral warmth…

In winter i notice the fuming sweet potato carts by the Nile and the smoking hot Huge pots of spicy chickpeas waiting for a cold couple to hold it’s hot cups and laugh over the heat of the chili meeting their cold teeth…

In winter i notice Cairo lights falling on the dark waters of the Nile painting a thousand paintings of Cairo night colors…

Coats and Shawls hug people intimately and encourage them to leave their warm beds and breathe in winter nights clean air…

My winter is about movies and poetry and the occasional ride with a loved one under Cairo preciously rare rain…

It’s the mild quiet announcement that another year will be gone forever…that another set of dreams need to be written and wholeheartedly wished for…and that a list of heartaches need to be torn away to a long gone farewell…

I love Cairo winter…I love my winter…

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Elections drag queens

The first parliament elections after the revolution should be a liberating very exciting experience for me…as giving my vote, now, should make me feel ecstatic since democracy “is” being practiced politically in my country now on a new wider scale.

But…I don’t feel this way…I don’t feel the democracy in the air after we fought away a corrupt regime…I feel confused and here’s why:

– The new age politicians and the new representatives of the public who are running for seats in the parliament are mostly from the old faces we’ve seen for years and who were in total cooperation with the old government…few new faces appeared…faces that have no experience and doing no publicity so i have no idea what are their agendas or what they are capable of.

– incidents of violence and killing distracted/consumed us during the last few months that proper preparation for the elections were not made.

– the way the fundamentalists and the Muslim brothers are gathering themselves so powerfully and organized is actually freaking me out…I do not believe in a religious political party…I think it defies the religious aspect and messes the political life…yet, I accept their representation as a democratic aspect…but in the absence of equal powers to sustain the balance…i am worried.

– Many of the candidates sound and seem like drag queens…they over do wanting to sound “politicians” while they only make me either laugh or feel sick :S

My dilemma now…I don’t have many names that fulfill my political needs so i can go there and vote for them…I need hard home work and research to find a couple of names who are worthy of representing me in the new era Egypt is starting.

My needs as a single working mother.

many discourage me saying that i shouldn’t bother as it will be a messed up situation in Egypt anyway…I refuse to think so…as, I have no asset in life now but passion and hope!

Love

why is it so hard for me to believe it…

that your heartbeats really breathe for me,

that you are a single cloud sheltering me,

that you rain just to nurture me,

that you’re insane for my passion,

that you see me…really me…

that the value of my heart is safe in your core…

that my sight and sensation bring life to you…

that you long for the mere existence of me…

that you worship through me…

that you are torn just to give into me…

that u see roses in my balms and smell the magic of the seas on my neck…

that you wake to the shine in my eyes and rest asleep on the silver beams on my chest…

that you rise onto my high waves…like a floating star…

and hang down deep with me…in the flames of love…

that you linger when i’m in your arms to linger when i’m so far…

that you’re stronger in my eyes and stronger when you weaken in me…above…

that you know what hope is…as you hope for my next sigh…

that you taste luscious sparks when you taste my traces…

that you desire heaven because heaven grants you I…

that you strive to feed me pleasure exerted from my pleasure…

that you ache to parent a tiny form of me…as you love me dearly…and endlessly forever…

that you might turn soft tunes to thunder to protect me from harm…

defend my heart with echos louder than any storm…

that i am the salvation…the manifestation of soul…

that you dream and ache to skin my back…

that you wanna live me…and die in me…

I find it hard to believe, yet doubts fail to keep me away…because i can’t believe you are capable of loving me the way i love you more and more each day…